MRT Boni Avenue

Noong high school ako… pnagpantasyahan ko yung best friend ko. AUsually sya yung theme ng fantasies ko kapag mag-jajack off... And I know he’s straight so I’ve never considered it to become real.

5 years later… That fantasy came true… well somehow….

It was a rainy afternoon. Just one more train station, and I’m coming down to go to the office. I’m actually running late. Then he got on the train. Our eyes met. And They refused to break the trance. Sabi ko sa sarili ko “bakit ngayon ka lang sumakay! Baba na ko eh!”

A towering 6’1, with dorky glasses and that straight black hair that I find really attractive he caught my attention just as the other gay guys on the train. BUT BUT I am going dow on the next station! Boni Staton na! Bakit kasi sa Shaw Boulevard ka lang sumakay…. Hay.

Then Tumatabi ako sa kanya. He still is looking at me. I am looking at him… Teka…

Then the door opens. Isang napakalalim na buntonghininga. HAAAAAYYY

He also stepped down on the same station. WAHHH and he is still looking WAHHHHH. Now my heart’s racing…

HONG GWOPO KO NOMON (talagang ako ang focus eh ano)

I’ll do this. I’ll get his number… parang sabi nga ni Dalumat, grace him with your presence wag ka nang mahiya. Haha ganun na lang inisip ko para maglakas loob. Lumapit ako. Tumitingin sya pero naglalakad sya diretso pababa.

“Pwede makuha number mo?” (ako)

“Baket?”
“Wala lang…” (ako)

“Teka sunod ka muna sa kin”

Nareject ba ako? TEKA LATE NA KO! Pero kasi Ansarap nya e if ever! Sige na nga sunod na lang… TEKA baka holdaper to. Pero anlaki ng katawan ko compared to him. Kaya ko sya… at pwede rin akong tumili.. saka pag after 5 mins wala pa alis na lang ako.. LATE na ko eh.

Then bumaba sya sa stairs then lumiko sa MCDO sa Boni Avenue. Ayun… Diretso sa CR. ALAM NA hahahaha

“Uhmm medyo late na kasi ako. Anung number mo?” (ako)

“Teka lang pa-late ka na”

“E… ano e”

Sabay kuha ng kamay ko at pinatong sa already hard na tootut nya… infurness… na convinced akong magpalate! Hahahaha

“Teka” Sabay bukas ng pinto ng cubicle.

Ayun na MOMOX (Make Out Make Out Xtreme). At syempre I’m already on my toes dahil 5’9 lang ako at sya ay 6’1. Anlabot ng labi pota.

“Palabas tayo. May tissue naman”

Then you know what happened next...

In the end, Got his number….  AT HINDI AKO NA LATE!

Itutuloy… hahaha

Hmmm RAWR!!!

It's official I have changed my expression from "Woof woof" and "Arf Arf"  to

RAWR!

Dan quotes

Life is a balance of choosing to be happy now and planning means on how to still be happy in the future. And it gets easier when you're aware that you are balancing it. RAWR!

Lately

            Lately I have been very frustrated about the scores I get on the tests in my training. You see, I had been hired by a Call Center for an inbound account and right now, it’s my 2nd week on training. I haven’t failed any written exams, but what’s making me frustrated is that I am always one point short from getting the perfect grade.

            Yeah, I know that passing an exam is already okay but since I had started going to school, my mom trained me to always hit the perfect score or if not get the highest grade compared to the rest. So since then, it doesn’t matter if I’ve received a high grade if I wasn’t the highest scoring student especially on subjects that I’ve studied really hard for.

         Right now, I’m trying to change this attitude because it causes unnecessary stress. I’m trying to convince myself that it’s ok to get these scores and you shouldn’t compare yourself to anyone. You should just try harder and improve the next time. And if you did yet you still didn’t get a better grade well it’s fine as long as you like what you’re doing…. It’s all about the climb as they say.

        Again, this is just training… I still have much bigger opportunity to excel out there on the production floor. ^__^ Be optimistic! Fight! RAWR!!!!

Also I will be making this improvement log to help me work out some points I need to work on.

Points for improvement 06/13/2011:
• Patiently read the question then go over it. You rush too much.
• Don’t compare yourself to others, only to your previous self
• Be thankful for the good things; Don't sulk on the bad ones

Somewhere only we know

You were just a daydream
Your lips that I fancied to kiss
Your skin that I wished to explore with my mouth
Your shoulders that I wanted to touch

Then the dream came true
In a place, dim and silent
In a place, hidden yet had always been there

Somewhere only we know…

You are your god

You are the center of the universe
The sun shall rise and set for you
The tides shall calm at your feet
and the moon shall hide its half on your countenance

But you must first learn
How it is to falter
How it is to crawl on dust and dunes

Learn not to cry when all is gone but a minute drop of hope
Learn to smile as the dreams you had since your innocence break and shatter in front of you
Learn to fly when the earth beneath you splits
Learn to stand and guard as a whirlwind goes against your path

Most of all
Know thy self
Know your passion
Your weakness
Your strength
And seek the things that make you happy

Master these and everything shall conspire for you
You are the sole master of your existence

Dialogues with myself in Baguio

so what if you have a pretty face and a nice body?

then you would be able to get all the guys that you want


no. attraction is not as superficial as you think

men are all the same. It's all about sex. Sex with someone hot, with someone gym-buff or with someone with an angel's face can only be obtained if you are hot, rich or lucky. Very few are rich in this unfortunate country, and one cannot always leave it to luck, beauty is the easiest and most convenient mean to get that sex everyone fantasies about.


Sex lasts on a maximum of only a couple of hours then after that life continues. Sex could not give you satisfaction in this life. It cannot unveil to you the reason of your existence or the roads of happiness in this lifetime.

who wants that? life nowadays is as fleeting as the waves. only few would be given a long life to pursue their live's cause. the pursuit for meaning of existence is nothing more than another task that we usually postpone for later then tragedy strikes: heart attack, cancer, plane crash, car accidents, etc. no one really finish with this life. so why pursue something that you are not sure you will achieve? the short term things, the superficial, the ephemeral are quantifiable, achievable, realistic and are well with-in reach. This will give you happiness that you CAN experience.


Let me follow your argument. the sad reality is that you are not beautiful. So the "well-within-reach" happiness you aspire for is nothing more than a mere fantasy. So this proposition you aspire for is not for you. This path cannot lead you to happiness. You are not rich nor beautiful. But you are wise. Use that brain to gain the money. Use the money to gain the looks. Use the looks to gain the sex. Use the look and the money to gain power. Ooooopppss that's too long of a cycle already, and as you have said life is fleeting, you don't have enough time to be happy, bastard.

the flaw of your argument is obviously not the assumption that beauty brings happiness but the assumption that this statement is universalizable. This works for some but it won't work for you. You believed in things that will only hinder you from being happy. Perhaps you are destined to find happiness in a much nobler way. May that way traveled like a short trip, like you want want it or may it be a long journey... no one knows.

well, it's just me wishing. tragic i know and yes, it brings me sadness. every rejection I get I blame my face and my body for it. the pimply skin, the chobby midsection, the dark skin. Irrational, stupid, and self-destructive as my beliefs seem to be they are what i am programmed with. it takes time to unlearn it. I hate long processes. I never liked a slow-burn no matter where it occurs.


you're young.. you'll get better. it would be awesome just wait.

we're young. we'll get better. I would be awesome just wait