Friday, April 1, 2011


I've always wondered how he manages to say the most rational and practical words at times when you really need to hear it. At times, his words are devoid of the luster of adventure, of excitement and thrill. Most of the times it's about what's practical, what's attainable and what won't disappoint you. Somehow... stupid as i may sound... magic is simply not part of his philosophy in life.

He had been through a lot I know. So much more than I had been through. He has 24 years of experience ahead of me. He had seen EDSA while I had only read about it on books. He had been a director and an actor for several plays while I am only learning the basics about theater. He had seen how vinyl evolved to casette then to compact disks while I am enjoying the convenience of playing mp3s in my cellphone. Long story short, he had been there and had done that while I am just going there, trying to be that. And perhaps in his traverse, he outgrew what I am believing now.

It's typical for old guys to be practical. They always go for what's tried and tested. Their approach in life seems to lack adventure, curiosity and  magic. Some are even afraid to explore what' out there 'coz it might give them pain.

But the young and their naiveté, their hope and their dreams, their exuberance and idealism,  are what makes the world seems perfect and at times magical. Then they'll say these are illusions, illusions of our innocence that blinds us from seeing the truth. But how much of the truth do I really need? What if the truth is a monster that feeds on dreams and hope, do i really need that?  Should I live in my delusions or is it better to live in a world of chaos?

I don't want to die as an old man. I want to die as a young soul. I want to die full of hope, believing in love, having faith in what's pure in every man's heart, and always believing in myself. I don't want magic to die in me. 

Stubborn as it may sound, idealistic or nonsense as some will say, but this is my life and this is how I want to live it full of passion and faith.

But luckily I have you to remind me that I still am existing in a world much bigger than what I think it is. Perhaps I should learn to live a life of balance? Would you like to board this train too? Let me remind you of the things that you said you outgrew.

Death is not the greatest loss in life.  The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.  ~Norman Cousins